Clowns Wearing Red Painted Smiles - Still Sorting Things Out

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By Kathy Ostman-Magnusen

It has been in those alone times, when the sun has met my skin, refreshed my heart, with its well mannered glow, that I have felt my own worth.

The moon has been a friend and foe. I dare not decipher which, because in every prism, there are too many mysteries to know. I dare not let that define me.

Late at night, when I wake up, I try to feel my being, know my own breath, lest I get lost in all those blinding concerns, again, that I cannot seem to cure. No, I cannot cure me.

Pages and pages, lines of text, I write to bless my own soul, and oh... I get lost all over. again, reflecting.

What agendas I explore? I fold up in little pieces, rip them up when I feel empty, lick up tears, swallow too hard, pull my own hair, close my eyes, hoping later... I will forgive me.

Who wants to prop up sad clowns? It's scary. I cannot know their motives.

Later on in the day, I will paint white on me, smear on a bright red smile, feel empty, maybe hopeless, alone, again.

Ahh sun! Where the heck are you? Sorry for my neglect. I forgot about worshipping stars, covered over for now, by your bloody light. Cover my eyes, lest I become blinded or much worse... accepting.

Touch my skin then will you? Remind me about later, later when I am hearing me breathe? Night clowns, stars out, wearing red painted smiles.

ABOUT Kathy Ostman-Magnusen

I paint and sculpt female fantasy art and map fairy tale adventures. I dream of beautiful women on canvas and art of exotic women.

I have illustrated for Hay House Inc.,"Women Who Do Too Much" CARDS, taken from Anne Wilson Schaef's book. I also illustrated for Neil Davidson, who was considered for the Pulitzer Prize in feature writing, and several other publications. My paintings are collected worldwide.

Giclee canvas art work, greeting cards and posters are available for sale on my website:

http://www.kathysart.com

Sign up for my mailing list for FREE ART GIFTS suitable for children: Drawings of whimsical angel pictures, legends of mermaids and fairies in art. Tiny angels whisper fantasy art for shrink art, or coloring pages. Also a "Letter From the Tooth Fairy", ya just never know when you might need one!

I am Represented by:

Monkdogz Urban Art, Inc., 547 West 27th Street, 5th floor, New York, NY 10001

ORIGINAL ART may be purchased through Monkdogz

Check out one of my many blogs on my MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/kathsart

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